Beware Of Confucius

Confucius

CONFUCIUS DID NOT SAY…

Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.

Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.

Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.

Squirrel who runs up woman’s leg will not find nuts.

Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.

Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who runs behind car gets exhausted.

Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.

War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It takes many nails to build a crib but only one screw to fill it.

Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.

Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.

Finally CONFUCIUS DID SAY. . …

“A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!”

7 Responses to “Beware Of Confucius”

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  1. Joyce says:

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    So true. So true.

    Joyce recently posted..FacebookMy Profile

  2. Thanks again for the mid week laugh!

    mommy oustide recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – A Pair of Pies w/linkyMy Profile

  3. Marcia/Blogitudes says:

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    Man who drives like hell is bound to get there! Love that one the best! These are great! Thanks so much for the laugh! Have a great day!

    Marcia/Blogitudes recently posted..OmnishamblesMy Profile

  4. Twitter ID:

    the Tiger Wood comment was the best!

    Rhonda@Laugh-Quotes recently posted..Butterman Time Travel: I’m Going Back To Carcassonne to See Flying Pigs!My Profile

  5. I love coming to this blog to get a good daily laugh – it’s a coffee break well spent! Thanks for being consistent with the jokes 🙂

    Matt @ Live music photographer recently posted..Water drops by a Brisbane macro photographerMy Profile

  6. Agent 54 says:

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    Tiger Wood.

    Agent 54 recently posted..Long Lost Mittens and GlovesMy Profile

  7. Comedy Plus says:

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    Bwahahahahahahaha. Loved them all, but the last one was spot on.

    Have a fabulous day Steve, filled with much laughter. 🙂

    Comedy Plus recently posted..Titanic vs. ClintonMy Profile