Blonde MEN Jokes II

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A blonde man shouts frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” asks the Doctor.
“No!” he shouts, “this is her husband!”
A blonde man was driving home, drunk as a skunk. Suddenly he has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another, then another.
A cop car pulls him over, so he tells the cop about all the trees in the road.
The cop says, “That’s your air freshener swinging about!”
A blonde man’s dog goes missing and he is frantic. His wife says “Why don’t you put an ad in the paper?”
He does, but two weeks later the dog is still missing.
“What did you put in the paper?” his wife asks.
“Here boy!” he replies.
A blonde man is in jail. The guard looks in his cell and sees him
hanging by his feet.
“Just WHAT are you doing?” he asks.
“Hanging myself,” the blonde replies.
“The rope should be around your neck” says the guard.
“I tried that,” he replies, “but then I couldn’t breathe.”
(This last one actually makes sense.)
An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: “Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?” To which the blonde man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”

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4 Responses to “Blonde MEN Jokes II”

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  1. Comedy Plus
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    says:

    It’s good to see blonde men taking some hits off these blonde jokes. I’m just saying.

    Have a blondetastic day Steve. 🙂
    Comedy Plus also recently posted..Comment GameMy Profile

  2. Abelle │ The Wows! and Oops! of Life says:

    I like them all! Thanks for the laugh! And btw, I like Johnny Bravo too ;o)
    Abelle │ The Wows! and Oops! of Life also recently posted..Tomorrow – AnnieMy Profile

  3. Joyce
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    says:

    Love the blond man jokes. Thanks for sharing.
    Joyce also recently posted..Musical Monday: I Love Chinese FoodMy Profile

  4. Rhonda Albom
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    says:

    That first one is hilarious. It’s my new favorite joke. Thanks for the giggles.
    Rhonda Albom also recently posted..Statue of Liberty Made Out of Jelly BeansMy Profile