Ed

Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside
his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, ‘You died in your sleep, Ed.’

Ed was stunned. ‘I’m dead? No, I can’t be! I’ve got too much to live for. Send me back!’

St. Peter said, ‘I’m sorry, but there’s only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.’

Ed was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home….
The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground.

A rooster strolled past. ‘So, you’re the new hen, huh? How’s your first day here?’

‘Not bad,’ replied Ed the hen, ‘but I have this strange feeling inside. Like
I’m gonna explode!’

‘You’re ovulating,’ explained the rooster. ‘Don’t tell me you’ve never laid an
egg before?’

‘Never,’ said Ed.

‘Well, just relax and let it happen,’ says the rooster. ‘It’s no big deal.’

He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!

He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood.

He soon laid another egg — his joy was overwhelming.

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard…..

“Ed, wake up! You shit the bed!”

Getting OLD just ain’t what they said it would be! 😯


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15 Responses to “Ed”

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  1. Russ
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    says:

    Sorry Steve but that one was a little gross.LOL

  2. Ian@Unofficial Chart Blog
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    says:

    Brings the phrase “Chicken Shit” into prospective LOL x

  3. Comedy Plus
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    says:

    Bwahahahahahaha. Yep, he had waaaaaaaay too much to drink.

    Have a terrific day. 🙂
    Comedy Plus also recently posted..Sex After DeathMy Profile

  4. Don E. Chute
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    says:

    Poor Ed…Things could get really-really nasty waiting for those to hatch.

    Nice One, B2
    Happy Trails…
    Don E. Chute also recently posted..CONSTITUTING AMERICA-THERE IS STILL TIMEMy Profile

  5. Art of RetroCollage
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    says:

    Glad I’m not reading this during breakfast!
    Art of RetroCollage also recently posted..Tempo of ResponseMy Profile

  6. Enfotainer says:

    I heard this one way before but still made me laugh like crazy…LOL
    Enfotainer also recently posted..Jailbreak iOS 431 On Your iPhone- iPod Touch- and iPad With Redsn0w 096RC9 UntetheredMy Profile

  7. ShoutBloger says:

    Ahaahaaaaaaaaaa………… it seems I will stop eating eggs from now
    ShoutBloger also recently posted..5 concept of Nokia Mobile Phone on The FutureMy Profile

  8. Lainy says:

    LOL! I can;t help but laugh out loud. So hilarious!