My wife said that she was leaving me because I always exaggerate. I was so shocked I almost tripped over my willy.
Someone broke into my house and stole a limbo stick. How low can you go?
The inventor of the USB stick has died. Thanks for the memory.
Just bought some Viagra tea bags. They don’t improve your sex life, but they stop your biscuits going soft.
Ironically… If you vote for the Green Party you will waste a piece of paper.
True fact: before the crowbar was invented… Most crows drank at home.
I’m reading a horror story in Braille.. Something bad is going to happen.. I can feel it.