A blonde man is in jail. The guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.
“Just WHAT are you doing?” he asks.
“Hanging myself,” the blonde replies.
“The rope should be around your neck” says the guard.
“I tried that,” he replies, “but then I couldn’t breathe.”
(This one actually makes sense.)
An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: “Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?”
To which the blonde man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”
A friend told the blonde man: “Christmas is on a Friday this year.”
The blonde man then said, “Let’s hope it’s not the 13th.”
Two blonde men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station.
One asked: “What if one explodes before we get there?”
The other says: “We’ll lie and say we only found two.”
A woman phoned her blonde neighbour man and said: “Close your curtains the next time you your wife are having sex. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday.”
To which the blonde man replied: “Well the joke’s on all of you because I wasn’t even at home yesterday 😯